This week we will be finishing up our series on "I Wish"! So, how can you as parents work at helping your student navigate the regret they might feel after they've made a poor choice or a bad decision?
First, create a tentative plan on how to react when
your student comes to you with some less than favorable news. What do you
want to be sure to communicate? What do you want to be sure not to
communicate? If you’re married, talk to your spouse and make sure that you
are both on the same page about how you will react.
And remember, you don’t only communicate through
your words. What other ways can you communicate care and understanding—your
tone of voice, your body language, your emotions? At this stage in the
game, parenting is less about control and authority and more about coaching and
influence. How can your reaction to your teenager in a tense moment be more
coaching-oriented than control-oriented?
More than anything, what
students need to know and hear—though they may never vocalize it themselves—is
that they are loved. No matter what. Chances are, whatever your student has
done that they feel regret over, they also feel guilt over, and are fearful of
rejection from you because of their actions. Creating a plan on how to
communicate your love and acceptance to your student regardless of what they do
or don’t do will ultimately set you up for success when they demonstrate some
less than desirable behavior.
Blessings!
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